(no subject)
Oct. 11th, 2008 12:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mockingbirdqFirst of all, I haven't been online lately. I've been sick - the antibiotics I received Monday at the doctor worked for Fox, but not me. So I've already racked up 3 days of sick days this week. Tomu actually called in a 1/2 day to work (the world may end ;) and he actually took me to the doctor and ran and got my prescriptions and some drinks and soup in the house. I don't know how I would have managed any of that without him because I was running high fever last night and this morning. He then went to work and I slept for 6 straight hours while Fox went to preschool.
Relationship stuff:
Tomu and I have been talking more and I feel like he is really trying to communicate better. My being sick this week has actually been a good thing because it has let him be all hovering and consoling, which normally makes me crazy but when I'm REALLY sick is kinda nice.
He is starting to understand that I'm going through my own little mid-life crisis and having some regrets about some choices we've made. But they are made now and we can't go back so we need to make some plans for the future instead. One thing that came out in typical male thinking was that if I am regreting anything about our life I must be regretting HIM, and of course that isn't the case, but he needed some reassurance. He understands he better not throw around the "D" word in fights, and I know a big part of that has to do with his parent's horrible divorce when he was a kid. Their fighting makes him think that good couples don't argue, I think ;)
When we met I was only 18 and he was 19. We were still kids for goodness' sake and we were each other's first love. All my college years are a blur of sneaking into his dorm room at night, and going camping together, and the first night we were together, when we lay in a field watching stars and talking for hours. Marriage, with all its responsibilities and arguments, was a complete shock. Then Fox came along and took all my time and energy and we kinda lost sight of each other - to busy trying to fulfil roles, and play happy little suburb couple with a kid, when that was never who either of us were.
So some counseling, and we're going to start having more time alone on weekends now that Fox is older, and start being more social and find some friends in the area who are geeks like us, and not people we have to pretend around. The hardest thing about moving here was leaving all our real friends who understood us in Nac.
Feeling better now and the shots I got today and the meds must be working because I have had low temperatures instead ;) I'm about to crawl into bed with my boys now though.
Relationship stuff:
Tomu and I have been talking more and I feel like he is really trying to communicate better. My being sick this week has actually been a good thing because it has let him be all hovering and consoling, which normally makes me crazy but when I'm REALLY sick is kinda nice.
He is starting to understand that I'm going through my own little mid-life crisis and having some regrets about some choices we've made. But they are made now and we can't go back so we need to make some plans for the future instead. One thing that came out in typical male thinking was that if I am regreting anything about our life I must be regretting HIM, and of course that isn't the case, but he needed some reassurance. He understands he better not throw around the "D" word in fights, and I know a big part of that has to do with his parent's horrible divorce when he was a kid. Their fighting makes him think that good couples don't argue, I think ;)
When we met I was only 18 and he was 19. We were still kids for goodness' sake and we were each other's first love. All my college years are a blur of sneaking into his dorm room at night, and going camping together, and the first night we were together, when we lay in a field watching stars and talking for hours. Marriage, with all its responsibilities and arguments, was a complete shock. Then Fox came along and took all my time and energy and we kinda lost sight of each other - to busy trying to fulfil roles, and play happy little suburb couple with a kid, when that was never who either of us were.
So some counseling, and we're going to start having more time alone on weekends now that Fox is older, and start being more social and find some friends in the area who are geeks like us, and not people we have to pretend around. The hardest thing about moving here was leaving all our real friends who understood us in Nac.
Feeling better now and the shots I got today and the meds must be working because I have had low temperatures instead ;) I'm about to crawl into bed with my boys now though.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2008-10-11 09:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-12 02:55 am (UTC)