mockingbirdq: (Default)
I'm alive, but tired. Mouse keeps taunting me by sleeping 5 to 6 hours one night, then staying up the entire night for 2 or 3 nights in a row. I think he's trying to keep me from being complacent :P

Fox is doing well, but not getting enough outside time since it's been so hot the past few weeks. 90+ degrees and 106 in the afternoon make it hard to do anything outdoors, even swimming. Thank goodness for his gymnastics camp days!

It's very strange knowing the school year is about to start, yet not having to go buy supplies for my classroom or redo my lesson plans. I'm very grateful to be able to stay home with the baby longer (hopefully the entire year) but I will miss my work and students. It hasn't quite hit me yet and I already miss losing such a huge part of my identity by leaving my job for this past 6 years.

That said, breastfeeding is going wonderfully. Still a few issues with the baby's latch, but overall he's doing well and gaining lots of weight. He's over 12 lbs. now!

I'm looking around for a small job to do from home and thinking about selling some small nursery paintings on etsy. Right now I'm trying to teach myself to crochet baby hats since I will otherwise spend a fortune buying cute ones on Etsy ;) I keep telling myself I need to go back to writing some fanfiction but I just haven't had any inspiration yet to continue some of my WIP fics. I'll have to try to change that...
mockingbirdq: (Default)
I'm curious as to how this works...

When I used "Juniper Tree" as an example, I got this result:

I write like
Dan Brown

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

But when I used "Hidden Memories" I got this:

I write like
Stephen King

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Obviously my writing style is inconsistant ;)
mockingbirdq: (Default)
Sean is getting bigger - over a pound heavier now- and stronger. He has a growling noise he makes whenever he doesn't like something (Seriously, I just moved to place him in the bassinet and he growls like a little bear cub ;)

He's less mouselike all the time, having discovered he has lungs and they are very capable of loud noise. He likes being held and listening to Fox talk to him. He does not like - being cold, being bathed, being diapered or anything else that consists of not being held and nursing constantly.

My bleeding is under control, most of my stitches have dissolved and we're doing well. If my car was just working and I could leave the house once in a while. Tomu is working long hours so he doesn't have the energy to take us around.


Jun. 9th, 2010 01:11 am
mockingbirdq: (kkmpants)
Went to the emergency room with late postpartum hemmoraging two days ago. After exams and ultrasounds, I was told it was likely just due to a hormone surge and to rest as much as possible and take some iron pills.

Tonight it just began again. I'm waiting 'till morning and just going to my OB/Gyn instead - although I have a child and newborn who are not allowed at the dr's office (no kids rule) and I'm technically not supposed to drive myself but Tomu can't take off work. I'm so tired of having abnormal things happen with this pregnancy and the aftermath, I swear!
mockingbirdq: (kyoko)
Just a quick update since our internet is being turned off later today (changing to a new company)

Sean was born last Friday at 2:15 pm at 6 lbs and 12 oz - which is decent considering he was born two weeks early. The induction went well, and my OB did a heroic job of keeping me from tearing much - just a few 2nd degree tears as opposed to the 4th degree tearing I had with Fox. I'm so glad I was able to have another vaginal birth because the recovery hasn't been bad at all.

That said, although the delivery went great, the aftercare did not. Sean was born hypoglycemic (low blood sugar) and his overproduction of insulin took several days to correct in a hospital that doesn't usually deal with babies who have medical issues. He was on IV's and I spent most of the first few days fighting nurses who didn't want me to breastfeed and who insisted on bottlefeeding Sean the formula he needed to keep his blood sugar up no matter what I requested (the formula I was fine with since my milk took a while to come in - it was the bottle feeding rather than using a syringe or supplementer I objected to.) It didn't help that the pediatrician never once met with us until discharge or that the hospital had no lactation consultant. We were so relieved to finally get home late Monday night...

Now Sean is doing well. He hasn't lost any weight and is starting to learn to breastfeed rather than bottlefeed now and we've stopped supplementing with formula. He is very quiet still, and Fox has taken to calling him "Mouse" because in his words, "He squeaks!". Overall he is a very good baby, and he looks so much like Fox as a baby that I can't believe it.

We're home and happy and healthy. I couldn't ask for more :)

mockingbirdq: (Default)
I'm being induced early tomorrow morning, but I'm just amazingly grateful to have made it to 38 weeks in this pregnancy. Baby boy isn't as active as the dr. would like, and won't let us wait any longer to have him. I'm tired and ready after a long, difficult pregnancy with HG and diabetes.

I did resign from my job. I'm not sure yet how we will manage financially, but in the next few weeks I plan to start looking at some ways to work part time, maybe even from home. We have a little savings to help and we'll manage since we have to. I've never wished so much for paid maternity leave though. Someday America will become civilized :P

That's all. I'm just praying all goes well tomorrow and I bring home our new son soon...
mockingbirdq: (hips)
It snowed last night - in Texas - in MARCH! Is the world coming to an end?

Oh well, Fox is thrilled ;)
mockingbirdq: (Default)
So far this pregnancy I've had to deal with hyperemesis the first 20 weeks (I was so lucky mine ended halfway), then low blood pressure and now I came up very positive for gestational diabetes and anemia. I think this is God telling me that I better not even THINK about having more than two children.

I so wish I could take maternity leave these last few months before the baby is born, but I have to make it all the way to the end. I'm just tired and ready to be home, holding my baby...
mockingbirdq: (smirk)
Nothing is as fun as waking up to a child crying and gasping "Mama, I'm sick!" before they vomit all over you and your bed. Except maybe giving them a bath, changing the bed and having such strong contractions start that you time them and call labor and delivery for advice.

He's vomited twice more since then, and managed to hit carpet and bed every time @_@ Poor Fox. I can't decide if he has a stomach flu or food poisoning though, since I ate off his plate at a restaurant last night and I feel a bit ill myself. Ugh...
mockingbirdq: (Default)
Isn't it strange that any article promoting circumcision appears on CNN and other American newspapers the same day? Yet the only reference I could find to this study showing circumcision has little or no benefit can only be found in British and Canadian news?

Sometimes I wish I lived in a civilized country... Y'know with universal health care, real maternity leave and national health policy that isn't pushing genital surgery for newborns.
mockingbirdq: (Default)
We had our 20 week ultrasound today and it's definitely a boy!

Fox got his wish for a little brother, and all the grandmas in the family who wanted a girl will just have to deal (there are 5 grandsons in the family and no girls on Tomu's side.) I'm pretty sure this will be our last baby, and two boys sounds like a perfect family for us :)
mockingbirdq: (hips)
Today Fox had to change to a different afterschool program and ride a bus for the very first time.

He was so nervous all weekend, but when I picked him up he asked if he could ride the school bus tomorrow and cheered when I said yes ;)

And just when I'm thinking he's so mature now, he crawls into my lap on the rocking chair and starts singing a little song he made up that basically went, "I love my mommy. Mommy I love you..." Until I sang back to him and his eyes suddenly closed and he fell asleep in my lap.

This was around two hours ago, so I guess he did have a stressful day. I'm going to follow him to bed now as well.

Sometimes, you think "Maybe life would be easier without children..." and then they remind you that it wouldn't be WORTH living without them :)

I don't have great maternity leave. I don't have all the time I want with my child. But we have a roof over our head, enough food and water that I don't have to wonder if my child will survive the next weeks and I think of what women in Haiti and so many other places are going through, at the very moment - and I realize I am so, so blessed.
mockingbirdq: (Default)
Fox was sick yesterday but doing better now. Tomu, Fox and I are all off school/work Monday so this is a nice, long weekend. I am tired all the time lately, and I've been in bed by 7pm nearly every night.

Thursday is my 20 week ultrasound and we've decided to go ahead and find out the gender if the baby cooperates. We weren't going to, but we need some time to prepare Fox if he has a sister (he keep insisting he's having a brother) and although I don't want a girl floating in pink, most of Fox's hand me downs were of the blue-suits-with-trucks-on-them variety. I'm tempted to use them all anyway and simply stick a bow on a girl's head though. When Fox was a baby we could have him dressed in dark blue from head to toe and people would STILL stop us and gush about the cute little "girl".

We're starting to try to dig through baby name books too. For a boy we are thinking about David, but we're not totally sold on that. For a girl we've batted around Ella and Kit. Truthfully, even once we find out gender it wiil probably take us months to decide on a name. We didn't pick Fox's until the day he was born!

The nausea is getting better now, but it comes and goes. I'll have a few days where I can eat pretty well, then a few more when I vomit constantly. Still, at least I'm not losing weight anymore.

Life is good ;)
mockingbirdq: (kyoko)
So Tomu and I are still sorting out our situation for next year. He's basically said since I really feel strongly about it that he'll support me to stay home with a baby as long as I need to - but that he can't promise we won't end up losing the house and moving in with his mom. Really, he says he just wants me to be happy and if being away from the last small baby we'll ever raise makes me miserable, we'll find a way to survive.

That said, I finally received a massive 20 page document on maternity leave and FMLA from my school district, and if I'm reading it correctly, then I could take almost 6 months off work when the baby is born!

This is just dumb chance, because I didn't plan it, but the baby will be born in early June. School doesn't begin again until the end of August and those first 2+ months don't count as part of Family medical leave act since they are school holidays. My FMLA wouldn't even start until the first day of school, and I could then have three more months at home. It ends around thanksgiving break, and I would work a few weeks then be off again for winter break. Basically I could have a long term sub, be unpaid for only 3 months and have nearly six months at home!

I would still rather be home the entire first year, but it would be nice to have a stable job and only have a few months to survive on savings. All in all, not a bad deal. I could survive pumping for 6 months after returning to work.

The only kink would be if I have to take off due to health reasons before the end of the school year, which might take away from FMLA time -or not. I'm going to speak with human resources more.

Tomu's work just called him in and told him he is changing to a different shift (with the implication his job is gone if he doesn't.)The only problem with this is that he takes Fox to school every morning so now we will have to put Fox in before school care and have him bused to his school - starting next week. He hates changes so he isn't going to like that much....

Yes, I'm still vomiting a lot but it is getting better and I'm not losing weight anymore. Our ultrasound is next Thursday!

baby stuff

Jan. 7th, 2010 08:32 am
mockingbirdq: (Default)
I'm 18 weeks pregnant now. The nausea is getting better - I'm only sick a few times a day now, so I think I will be one of the lucky sufferers for whom HG ends by 20 weeks - Thank goodness. I've been able to feel the baby moving for a few weeks now, and Tomu can too when the baby is being especially active- which is a lot. I think this one will be hyper like its big brother Fox ;) I am already having braxton-hicks which is weird since I never had them until the last month with Fox.

I still haven't figured out what I'm going to do about work next year. In a perfect world (or better country) I could be off for 6 months or a year to have time to bond with my baby. Instead I have to decide between finding a way we can survive financially if I stay home for a year, find a decent paying part time job that lets me earn enough for even part time childcare, do childcare for others in my home or simply work full time and know that I will be exhausted and miserable and have to formula feed.

I keep going over our budget but I just can't find a way to manage our home on one income even if we cut back. We could drop one car, drop childcare and live off our very small savings, but it would be very shaky and barely possible...

Tomu isn't very supportive of the idea either. He doesn't understand at all WHY I even want to be home with the baby after it is born. I try to explain how horrible I felt putting Fox in daycare each day at 6 months, and I would be doing it to this child at 6 weeks. I try to explain how hard it is to pump from work. I try to explain that I will need time myself to recover from this difficult pregnancy and giving birth. Just - blank expression. He's a man and it really doesn't compute. He hated the short time he stayed home with Fox as an older baby and he was much happier coming home at night, cuddling and playing with him a bit and then putting him to bed. That just made me feel like I had missed his whole day and infancy passes so fast. This will be our last baby and I don't want to miss any of it this time...
mockingbirdq: (Default)
So already DH and I are having a debate about parenting this new little one.

I feel it is very important I be home and this baby NOT end up in daycare at 2 months old when the new school year begins. By the time I pay over 1K a month for daycare, and another few hundred for formula, I'll be making a scant $1,000 a month to pay someone else to raise my babe. Not something I want to do.

On the other hand, if I stay home with the baby for that year, we will literally be losing half of our income, and it will be a real struggle. On the other hand, I will be home with the baby each day, I can breastfeed exclusively, and I can pick up Fox when school ends each day so we won't have to pay for the afterschool care (saving another $300 monthly.) Not to mention that I would actually have time to cook, because we eat out and use convenience foods far too much right now.

We're going to try living on one income for the next six months and just see if it is possible. I know the thought scares Tomu to death, but I really feel strongly that 8 weeks is far too young for a baby to be in daycare and this baby deserves the same benefits of breastmilk that Fox had.

I have a feeling the next few months will be stressful as we hash this out...
mockingbirdq: (kyoko)
So in 2009, I found out I was pregnant, discovered what hyperemesis gravidarum was,Fox began kindegarten and I wrote far too much Star Trek fanficiton. Not a horrible year, if a bit frustrating ;)

Found this blog post a few days ago and want to share it, since she makes a nice in-your-face argument against RIC. Not very scientific in her arguments, but I think that actually makes the post stronger. Share with expectant parents if you agree with her and me.

mockingbirdq: (Default)
We tried to control Christmas spending this year, but Fox still ended up with far too much stuff.

So far he has gotten:
-a Bakugan tent, uno game, nerf gun and dinosaur toy from santa claus ;)
-A vtech laptop from Nana
-Play doh set from his aunt.
-A wooden castle with Narnia knights and a dragon from mom and dad. (I bought it 75% off two years ago and was saving it until he was old enough ;)
-A Star Wars Leapster from Mom and Dad. (50% at Amazon last month!)
-An Air Hogs remote control car (75% at Target last summer)
-A stocking full of candies to rot his teeth out, and a toothbrush set to counteract that.

This wouldn't seem too horribly excessive, but he still has another half of a family to get gifts from. Hopefully they will tend towards clothing instead of toys, but I doubt it!

Tomu got me a white gold cross and a new digital camera to replace my dead one. Fox's teacher had them make a calendar of their artwork, along with printed photos and different sentences about their families. Coolest kid present ever, and I now feel guilty that I only gave her some lotion for a Christmas gift ;)

All in all, a nice Christmas. The most amazing thing was the four inches of snow that fell yesterday, so that we still have a white Christmas outside this morning. That never happens in Texas!
mockingbirdq: (Default)
I had to put my cat Cricket to sleep today.

The vet we went to last month said he only had an abcessed tooth and acted like we were horrible for having him give him some meds rather than let him have surgery to correct it.

Cricket has started having problems eating again and crying this week though, so I took him to a different vet my sister recommended. He said Cricket had a heart murmur which meant his odds of surviving surgery weren't good, and that it didn't look like he had an abcessed tooth at all. He said the growth on the side of Cricket's face was a tumor and likely causing him a lot of pain.

So I had him put to sleep because he was just too old to put through a lot of surgeries he likely wouldn't survive and I wanted him out of pain.

Cricket was my first cat when I was still in high school. I found him outside our door a few weeks after our dog had gotten loose and been run over by a car. He was unconscious and barely weaned, and my mother let me bring him into the house because she was sure he wouldn't survive. I gave him water with an eyedropper and laid him under a fan in a little box. The next morning he popped his little head up with a "meow" and started walking around liked he owned the place ;) We named him "Cricket" because he loved to hop on top of all the shelves and I have a photo of him somewhere showing him balanced on the top of an open door. When I went to college he became my parents' cat and they wouldn't give him back when I graduated. My dad was too attached to him.

Poor old boy. He dealt with moving, and becoming one of five cats my parents had eventually, then moving in with us after my parents moved and my father died. He was always a sweet, standoffish cat and I'll miss him...


Dec. 14th, 2009 12:39 am
mockingbirdq: (days like this)
The past week has sucked in so many ways...

My nearly 20 year old cat has another abcessed tooth, and his health is not up to the surgery. I may have to have him put to sleep this week :(

Not one of the 30 children we invited came to Fox's party, which left him upset and disappointed, and us unhappy since they wouldn't let us just pay the deposit- we had to pay a whole $200 for the party that didn't even happen. Poor kiddo...
I will say that we are NOT attending anymore classmates' parties this year, and I wish we hadn't attended the 8 we have. I get that this is close to Christmas but how hard is it to take one hour out of your afternoon?

My hyperemesis is not improving. I've lost more weight and after Tomu came along to the last appointment my OB finally suggested a pump and IV at home. However, I'm putting the nursing company off a few days because I want to see a doctor I can actually trust. I'm going to my sister's OB/Gyn tomorrow to get a second opinion before inserting the pump....

I can't keep anything down and I'm so beyond miserable. I don't know how I'm going to keep doing this.
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