a dream and an observation
Jun. 2nd, 2008 01:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mockingbirdqLast night I dreamt I was teaching. One of the Principals came in and strongly suggested that another school had a position open and I should go there. So I went there to talk to someone. When I came out, my father was in the car with Fox, who couldn't have been more than 2 years old. We couldn't leave because there wasn't a car seat and it was getting dark. The parking lot was empty.
I was speaking with my father and he was talking the way he had at the end of his life - mostly quiet, sometimes surly - when it suddenly dawned on me - "You're dead Papa. You can't be here.". To which he replied "I know, I just thought you needed me." Then my Mom pulled up in her car to help, and he was gone. I woke up crying.
The funny thing is, the first thing Fox said when he woke up was "I dreamed about Nana!" Something about it being her birthday party. I didn't ask him if Papa was there :)
On a lighter note, or darker, a mom on the AP group I belong to wrote this: http://community.livejournal.com/attachedparents/1019577.html and it ROCKS!
I mean, I was only born and survived due to c-section and formula due to my mother's massive disabilities (Hell, she was advised to abort me) but something is wrong in the United States when 1 in 3 births is a c-section and only 50% of moms even try breastfeeding. I hate to think I will only have 6 weeks at home with my nest child and then be forced to find a place to pump breastmilk privately - nearly impossible in a public school. I still wish I could have stayed home with Fox longer. something is wrong in a country when you need 2 incomes just to get above poverty level...
Crap - I just edited to correct the horrible spelling. I promise I do have an English degree. Gah!
I was speaking with my father and he was talking the way he had at the end of his life - mostly quiet, sometimes surly - when it suddenly dawned on me - "You're dead Papa. You can't be here.". To which he replied "I know, I just thought you needed me." Then my Mom pulled up in her car to help, and he was gone. I woke up crying.
The funny thing is, the first thing Fox said when he woke up was "I dreamed about Nana!" Something about it being her birthday party. I didn't ask him if Papa was there :)
On a lighter note, or darker, a mom on the AP group I belong to wrote this: http://community.livejournal.com/attachedparents/1019577.html and it ROCKS!
I mean, I was only born and survived due to c-section and formula due to my mother's massive disabilities (Hell, she was advised to abort me) but something is wrong in the United States when 1 in 3 births is a c-section and only 50% of moms even try breastfeeding. I hate to think I will only have 6 weeks at home with my nest child and then be forced to find a place to pump breastmilk privately - nearly impossible in a public school. I still wish I could have stayed home with Fox longer. something is wrong in a country when you need 2 incomes just to get above poverty level...
Crap - I just edited to correct the horrible spelling. I promise I do have an English degree. Gah!
